My Struggle With Depression
I wrote an article for The Hollywood Reporter about my struggle with my depression and how I finally conquered it. Here is the beginning:
When I was 13, I tried to take my own life by hanging myself in my school’s locker room. The pipe around which I tied my necktie broke under my own weight when I jumped off the windowsill to the floor. Scared and alone, I ran out of the locker room, trying to sort out my muddled thoughts.
After the necktie incident I started seeing a psychiatrist. It helped to some extent. However, my depression and suicidal urges remained, often growing stronger for long periods of time and never waning much.
Recently, two public figures have taken their own lives. Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain had both built successful careers, enjoyed great wealth and, to the outside eye, appeared to be living their best lives. We — the public — loved them, but they also had friends and family who loved them. Each had a daughter about the same age as my own daughters. In truth, despite these important relationships, they found their lives too painful to bear. When I read the news, I thought, I know what that’s like. I fought for my own life for decades, and I’ve only recently benefited from a treatment that has finally helped lift the fog of my lifelong depression. We are losing too many people to this illness, yet it’s something we don’t talk about. People are suffering silently all around us. If we are going to fight against it, and to conquer, that has to change. That’s why I want to tell you my story.